An infidel woman: The scandalous “pink nighty” in ‘Meray paas tum ho’.

Two days back I woke up to see social media upset and demanding PEMRA to ban a play called “Merey paas tum ho”. The lead actress was trolled for choosing the worst role of her life and much up-roar was made about a “scandalous pink nighty” in one of the episodes.

Since I had not watched the play I rushed to YouTube to see what the hangaama was about. To my surprise the play had a typical storyline of a middle class government employee Danish (Humanyon Saeed)  with a pretty wife Mehwish (played by Aieza Khan) and a kid, struggling to make ends meet because he is naïve and honest. His wife on the other hand dreams of a better lifestyle with luxuries. A lovable family sets the picture perfect scene of the first episode, till the entry of a rich business man Shahwar played by none other than Adnan Siddiuqi.

Shahwar spots Mehwish among common friends and finds her attractive and starts giving her compliments on her beauty, the over possessive husband finds the sitaution discomforting and starts to act insecure. Despite of being aware of the rich mans bad intentions he chooses to be friends with him and visits his house to meet him socially, reasons only known to him.

The play quickly takes a turn when Mehwish ends up working for Shahwar with the permission of her husband. Her job description is just to give him company and comfort him in times of distress, up until the platonic relationship turns into an extra martial-affair with both flying off to Islamabad for a day, without informing Mahwish’s husband of her travel plans.

The next scene takes place in a hotel with two inter-connected rooms and Mehwish wearing a pink nighty; rather symbolic to show the intensity of the affair. She is then seen extremely worried that her flight from Islamabad to Karachi got delayed due to bad weather and if she doesn’t reach home on time what will the husband say or do. The episode ends with the husband finding out about her day trip and practically catching her red handed at the airport and taking her home silently as an expression of his love for his wife. 

After watching the play and seeing the bashing on social media, I wonder what is it that people are so upset about; after all it’s just a play. Has the play struck a wrong cord for our society?   

The answer is very obvious, Infidelity is morally wrong. Extremely wrong morally and religiously for both MEN & WOMEN on all levels.

 But it’s wrong on a superlative degree if the infidel is a married woman with a kid.  If a man is found cheating he still has an option of second marriage to make it kosher.The fiber of the society is shaken if a woman god forbid finds some other man attractive.  Which brings us to the next big question, why would a married woman feel the need to cheat, when she has a loving husband and an adorable kid, what else does she want from life.  The easiest excuse is to say that a woman or let say Mehwish in the play is a gold digger, who is abandoning her wonderful life for greener pastures.  Is it only money that makes a woman cheat in a relationship??

If we consider the circumstances of the above mentioned play we see that the female protagonist is not a cheat to begin with, she didn’t plan to find a rich man and leave her previous relationship, she is from a humble and conservative background. Then why did she choose to take a step so unforgiving both morally and religiously.

Let’s have a look at her relationship with her husband, the almost too good to be true husband in the above play can be partially blamed for this distress in the family. The man Danish in the play is 24/7 vulnerable, extremely overprotective, needs too much attention at all times as he has no friends or social circle of his own, has no definite goals or ambitions in life, every conversation with him is a sad saga of his failure to achieve the best for the family, an emotional outbreak is waiting for the wife at every discussion, she is continuously pampering his insatiable desire to be the hero of the family, pretty exhausting I must say. He, in his almost decade old marriage did nothing to grow financially or intellectually. His honesty refrains him from being financially better-off, yet he never thought of doing some other ‘honest’ work or a part time job to make things better money wise. 

 The second most important thing is that just like Mehwish in the play, the women in our part of the world are never treated like adults who have the right to choose good or bad for themselves. Most choices are already made for them, firstly by their parents and secondly by the man they tie the knot with, giving them no room to grow or have the ability or capability of decision making.  These decisions can be from the choice of the outfit (which is often what the husband likes), to handling attention given from outsiders. Women are simply not prepared to handle the situation of the big bad world.

Women definitely need that intellectual growth to be able to protect and rescue themselves in vulnerable situations and not fall prey to malicious desires. This ability will only come when a woman is treated like an adult; given room to choose what is morally right and the strength to bear the consequences of her choice. No sane woman plans to cheat or break her home it’s just that circumstances lead to extreme actions. The devil is seducing women and men both, by addressing the demons buried deep inside the subconscious. How do we protect the institution of marriage in such times? We cannot shun the outside world completely; the only way to stay on track is to be able to address the danger that lies outside and the confidence to fight that danger. This over protectiveness is actually making women oblivious of their surroundings, they are unable to identify the danger and hence fall out of the relationship. Once she has the understanding , yet  she still chooses to cheat then its best to let go of her. 

Coming back to the play, surprisingly, many viewers want Mehwish to pay  for her actions, regret her wrong-doing and be damned for betraying her family, sadly infidel men in our plays and society still find forgiveness for their actions but not women. There is no forgiveness for women- anywhere.